Empowering widowed people
to create their new identity with grace, ease, and, yes, a bit of
healthy rebellion.
Empowering widowed people
to create a new identity with
grace, ease, and, yes, a bit of
healthy rebellion.
Schedule Your Free DISCOVERY Call
Create the new, fullest version of yourself no matter where you are on your healing journey, not by pushing or forcing yourself through the traditional ways of doing grief, but by using my fluid, guiding and powerful 12 Healing Widow Grief Rebel Principles.
Schedule Your Free DISCOVERY Call
Download
THe twelve Healing Tenets
Download THe Twelve HEaling Tenets
Discover your
next healing step.
shine
rebuild
I'm here to
help you rebuild
and shine
again.
I'm here to
help you
rebuild
and shine
again.
I'm here as your partner in healing to help you create your new, redesigned life.
- Permanently Release Stuck, Intense Emotions
- Completely Refuel Your Body, Mind and Spirit
- Regain Joy, Laughter and Ease
- Revitalize Your Clarity, Purpose and Passion
- Feel Fully Alive Again
- Clearly Answer Your Deepest Questions
- Create Crystal Clear Boundaries
- Build New, Strong, Healthy Intimate Relationships
Interruptive, Intense Emotion
Unhealthy Relationships
Easy Overwhelm
Higher Levels of Anxiety
Periods of Hopelessness
Elevated Irritability/Anger
Fatigue
Difficulty Concentrating
Food, Drink, Sex Void Fillers
Lack of Focus/Drive
Hyper Activity/Hyper Hustle
Grief is Messy.
Grief is Messy.
Difficulty Sleeping
Intense Guilt/Shame
Although grief is a universal human response when we experience trauma or intense loss, the way each of us grieves is totally unique to each one of us. Following the death of our spouse or partner, while one of us may experience numbness and seeming unresponsiveness, others of us may writhe in pain uncontrollably and still others of us may experience something in between.
The good news is that you can heal no matter how you are grieving. The GREAT news is that you are already grieving perfectly the right way for you!
I've developed a Coaching System and Healing Framework that will help you accept the way you grieve, release intense emotions and regain your balance, energy and trust. I know I can help you live a life after your spouse or partner has died beyond what you think is possible. I've done it. I know you can too!
Numbness/Lack of Feeling
Each day, each step, and each moment you choose to lean into saying yes to what you can do, no matter how small or inconsequential it may feel, your life moves towards what's possible. I do believe that you can live the life of your dreams following the death of your spouse or partner. Right now you may not believe you can rebuild to a life you absolutely love. That's ok. It's my job to powerfully hold that space for you while you expand into it. I invite you to say yes right now and join me in an initial connection call. I promise that you will find incredible value, insights and healing in our 45 minutes together.
Grief is Surprising and Confusing.
Grief is Twisting and Contorting.
Grief is Intense and Complex.
when your spouse or partner died.
I'm here to partner with you to help you create your new, redesigned life.
grief traits
are you experiencing?
Although grief is a universal human response when we experience trauma or intense loss, the way each of us grieves is totally unique to each one of us. Following the death of our partner or spouse, while one of us may experience numbness and seeming unresponsiveness, others of us may writhe in pain uncontrollably and still others of us may experience something in between. The good news is that you can heal no matter how you are grieving. The GREAT news is that you are grieving perfectly the right way for you. I've developed a Coaching System and Healing Framework based on The 12 Widow Grief Rebel Principles that will help you accept the way you grieve, release intense emotions and regain your balance, energy and trust. I know I can help you live a life after your spouse or partner has died beyond what you think is possible. I've done it. I know you can, too.
Each day, each step, each moment you choose to lean into saying yes to what you can do, no matter how small or inconsequential it may feel, your life moves towards what's possible.
I do believe that you can live the life of your dreams following the death of your spouse or partner. Right now you may not believe you can rebuild to a life you absolutely love. That's ok. It's my job to powerfully hold that space for you while you expand into it.
My mission is to support you. Listen to you. Help you.
My mission is to
Support you.
Listen to you.
Help you.
Healing begins by saying yes.
I experienced all of these grief traits following the death of my wife, Karen.
Healing begins by saying yes.
I invite you to say yes right now and join me in an initial connection call. I promise that you will find incredible value, insights and healing in our 45 minutes together. Bring a challenge, question and/or emotional release to the call and experience healing.
- Permanently Release Stuck, Intense Emotions
- Completely Refuel Your Body, Mind and Spirit
- Regain Joy, Laughter and Ease
- Revitalize Your Clarity, Purpose and Passion
- Feel Fully Alive Again
- Clearly Answer Your Deepest Questions
- Create Crystal Clear Boundaries
- Build New, Strong, Healthy Intimate Relationships
SCHEDULE YOUR
FREE CALL WITH JIM
SCHEDULE YOUR
FREE CALL
I'd love
to hear
more, Jim
I felt all of these grief traits at various times
following the death of my wife, Karen.
Susan Hannifin-MacNab
...and pinpoint my emotional blocks has helped me move through relationship and dating challenges with surprising ease. Jim is both professional and experienced. So many times I've stopped during our session to jot notes about his surprising insights. Jim's wisdom in knowing just what to say has moved me to many 'aha!', transformative moments. His healing formula combines patience, unconditional support, empathy, practical (and new!) frameworks and, yes, some laughter, too! I highly recommend working with Jim Spelman."
Jim's ability to deeply
"
and profoundly listen...
Author, Social Worker, Widow
AS SEEN ON
Susan
Hannifin-MacNab
My mission...
to guide you to discover and proudly own your new identity following the death of your spouse or partner.
With My Coaching Method You Will:
- Be unconditionally listened to in a completely nonjudgmental, safe space.
- Fully accept yourself and the way you are grieving.
- Utilize a practical 'Healing Framework' to effortlessly determine and fill your wants and needs moment to moment, day to day.
- Learn to live harmoniously with the death of your partner or spouse.
- Free yourself from the intense pain of your loss.
- Learn how to easily physically and emotionally refuel when your tanks are empty or low.
- Safely and permanently release even the most intense emotions.
- Discover how to create spontaneous joy and fun again.
- Learn strategies and structures to create healthier intimate relationships while nurturing the relationship you still have with your dead spouse or partner.
- Find out your own powerful answers to the complex questions around sex, dating and new relationships.
- Become your own best teacher with solid boundaries and crystal-clear communication.
- Replace old, limiting beliefs and patterns with new beliefs that fuel, further, and foster the new you.
My soul (and sole) mission is to help you create a renewed life after the death of your spouse or partner. I truly believe that you are here reading this at the perfect time. Our initial 45 minute connection call is free, completely confidential and extremely useful. Bring a challenge, question or emotional release to the call. My promise is that even if this is our only call, you will come away with learnings as well as healing. We can also discuss if we're a good coaching fit for each other. If we both feel we're a good fit, I will thoroughly and openly explain session and package pricing.
Do you want
to heal?
To begin to
live fully?
Do you want
to heal?
To begin to
live fully?
SCHEDULE YOUR FREE
DISCOVERY CALL
- Be unconditionally listened to in a completely nonjudgmental, safe space.
- Fully accept yourself and the way you are grieving.
- Utilize a practical 'Healing Framework' to effortlessly determine and fill your wants and needs moment to moment, day to day.
- Learn to live harmoniously with the death of your partner or spouse.
- Free yourself from the intense pain of your loss.
- Learn how to easily physically and emotionally refuel when your tanks are empty or low.
- Safely and permanently release even the most intense emotions.
- Discover how to create spontaneous joy and fun again.
- Learn strategies and structures to create healthier intimate relationships while nurturing the relationship you still have with your dead spouse or partner.
- Find out your own powerful answers to the complex questions around sex, dating and new relationships.
- Become your own best teacher with solid boundaries and crystal-clear communication.
- Replace old, limiting beliefs and patterns with new beliefs that fuel, further, and foster the new you.
My soul (and sole) mission is to help you rebuild your life following the death of your partner or spouse and I truly believe that you are here reading this at the perfect time.
Our initial 45 minute connection call is free, completely confidential and extremely useful. My promise is that even if this is our only call, you will come away with inspiration, learnings as well as healing.
Find out how you can create ease and peace no matter how you're grieving...
Yes. I'm ready to lean
even more into my healing.
Yes. I'm curious.
Can my grief really be an opportunity to grow?
About Me and My Coaching Process
I now live an adventurous life I LOVE with my wife, my son, my stepson and our two cats, Farley and Chase, in the Chicagoland area. In addition to coaching, teaching and speaking, I love my career as an artist. In between coaching sessions, most days you can find me in my studio passionately creating, photographing, and printing.
Get 'The 12 Widow Grief Rebel Healing Tenets' — my free, downloadable and printable posters to help you not only survive but THRIVE following the death of your spouse or partner.
Get your Free Healing
kickStarter KIT
As a coach, speaker and author, I've helped many, many people like you who have lost a spouse or partner and are willing to lean into healing and living no matter what has happened or what is happening presently in their life. My own life blew apart when my wife died giving birth to our baby boy. Since then, I've rebuilt my life from shattered to shining many times over!
I don't have any super powers, special qualities or magical abilities. Like you, I've leaned into healing and chose to say yes to being open, to asking questions and to finding answers to my difficult questions. Because of my own healing journey, I see grief quite differently now. I see grief as a possibility to grow, heal and learn and I carry that possibility with me into every coaching session. I would be honored to be able to hand that powerful healing baton to you.
You may not see your grief and healing journey as an opportunity (yet) and that is perfectly understandable. (I didn't at first for sure!) Your grief journey is YOURS and I believe you are doing it PERFECTLY for you. You are here at the perfect time. Right now you are healing. Right now, just by reading this, you are saying yes to living your life beyond what you thought possible. Whether or not we ever speak, I honor you and your profound journey.
- Twelve Powerful Healing Principles to help guide you to healing everyday, moment to moment.
As a coach, speaker and author, I've helped many, many people like you who have lost a spouse or partner and are willing to lean into healing and living no matter what has happened or what is happening presently in their life. My own life blew apart when my wife died giving birth to our baby boy. Since then, I've recreated my life from shattered to shining many times over!
I don't have any super powers, special qualities or magical abilities. I've leaned into healing and chose to say yes to being open, to asking questions and to finding answers to my difficult questions. Because of my own healing journey, I see grief quite differently now. I see grief--with a dose of feistiness and a bit of healthy rebellion--as a possibility to grow, heal and learn and I carry that possibility with me into every coaching session. I would be honored to be able to hand that powerful healing baton to you.
You may not see your grief and healing journey as an opportunity (yet) and that is perfectly understandable. (I didn't at first for sure!) Your grief journey is YOURS and I believe you are doing it PERFECTLY for you. You are here at the perfect time. Right now you are healing. Right now, just by reading this, you are saying yes to living your life beyond what you thought possible. Right now you are being a Grief Rebel in being curious and inquisitive about a new way to heal. Whether or not we ever speak, I honor you and your profound journey.
Free
Healing
12 Tenets
Guide
Free
Healing
Kickstart
Guide
Get your Free
Twelve Healing
Tenets
guidebook
Free
Healing Kickstart
Kit
No Matter Where You Are on Your Healing Journey
THIS WILL HELP
Get 'The 12 Widow Grief Rebel Healing Tenets' — my free,
downloadable and printable posters to help you not only survive but begin to THRIVE following the death of your spouse or partner.
Get your
Free
Twelve Healing Tenets Guidebook
As a coach, speaker and author, I've helped many, many people like you who have lost a spouse or partner and are willing to lean into healing and living no matter what has happened or what is happening presently in their life. My own life blew apart when my wife died giving birth to our baby boy. Since then, I've recreated my life from shattered to shining many times over!
I don't have any super powers, special qualities or magical abilities. I've leaned into healing and chose to say yes to being open, to asking questions and to finding answers to my difficult questions. Because of my own healing journey, I see grief quite differently now. I see grief--with a dose of feistiness and a bit of healthy rebellion--as a possibility to grow, heal and learn and I carry that possibility with me into every coaching session. I would be honored to be able to hand that powerful healing baton to you.
You may not see your grief and healing journey as an opportunity (yet) and that is perfectly understandable. (I didn't at first for sure!) Your grief journey is YOURS and I believe you are doing it PERFECTLY for you. You are here at the perfect time. Right now you are healing. Right now, just by reading this, you are saying yes to living your life beyond what you thought possible. Right now you are being a Grief Rebel in being curious and inquisitive about a new way to heal. Whether or not we ever speak, I honor you and your profound journey.
Get your
Free
twelve healing tenets guidebook
A Special Note About Healing...
As I've come to discover through my own healing journey and through coaching people like you, linear time has no relevance in the matter of our grieving. No matter when your spouse or partner died or where you are in your healing journey--very recent, 6 months, a year or two, ten, twenty--your world has split wide open.
No matter how long it's been, how are you feeling right now at this very moment? Stuck? Numb? Hurt? Angry? Enraged? Sad? Confused? Overwhelmed? Fatigued? Some or all of these?
What are you struggling with at this very moment? Motivation? Family? Relationships? Sex? Kids? Confidence? Dating? Career? Energy (hyper or low)? Health? Spirituality? Some or all of these?
I'd like to share something that would have helped me greatly had I learned it sooner. My hope is that it helps you right now with however you are feeling and whatever your struggles.
I've created a guiding, powerful framework called the Twelve Grief Rebel Healing Tenets. They are included in my free healing kickstarter and I use them in my coaching and as a personal guide everyday. One of the Tenets is 'Prioritizing My Self-Care is Necessary for Me to Heal'.
Are you prioritizing yourself? Are you coming first in your healing journey? It may seem counterintuitive to put yourself first. In fact, making yourself number one may feel downright wrong (at first).
I didn't prioritize myself or my healing early on. Like you, when my wife died I was exploded into a million pieces. She died giving birth to our son. So, not only did I experience the shock of her sudden death, but I was also thrust into the world of single parenting and the world of parenting a special needs child. (Our son, Leo, had many severe complications at birth.)
Needless to say, I didn't feel like I could prioritize myself. I felt trapped, abandoned, hurt and so very angry. I thought prioritizing myself was selfish, lazy and made me somehow weaker.
But looking back, knowing what I know now, what would it have looked like to prioritize myself and my healing? First, I would have asked for WAY more help (that's a Healing Tenet by the way). Then I would have taken A LOT more time for myself. Lastly, I would have known that not only was I being a GREAT Dad by prioritizing me, but Leo would have thrived, too!
I do prioritize myself and my healing, now. And guess what? The more I do the more my life AND my family's lives thrive!
What could it be like for you?
What could you transform in your life right now if you were to prioritize yourself and your healing?
I promise you that not only will you heal more quickly when your own healing is your top priority, but your world, like mine, will shift so that others around you (kids, family and other close relationships) will grow too.
(Yes, seems like the opposite would happen but, no, your healing does help others. BONUS!)
So, how do you prioritize you and your own healing?
Quite Simply. You. Get. Help.
(Pssst...that's a Healing Tenet, too!)
Whether it's me, a counselor, books, support groups or another coach, asking for and receiving help is NECESSARY to heal. If you've got help already and it's not working for you or not working as well as you want it to, then it's probably time to add or change the help you're choosing.
I'm not attached to who or what you choose. My hope is that you do choose to ask for and receive help. Whether it's me or you find another resource, my most heartfelt hope is that you get the help you need to choose yourself first, to heal bigger, and to not just survive but THRIVE.
I know ease, freedom and joy are possible for you RIGHT NOW.
I would love to hear how you're doing on your journey.
Your Partner in healing,
Jim
As I've come to discover through my own healing journey and through coaching people like you, linear time has no relevance in the matter of our grieving. No matter when your spouse or partner died or where you are in your healing journey--very recent, 6 months, a year or two, ten, twenty--your world has split wide open.
No matter how long it's been, how are you feeling right now at this very moment? Stuck? Numb? Hurt? Angry? Enraged? Sad? Confused? Overwhelmed? Fatigued? Some or all of these?
What are you struggling with at this very moment? Motivation? Family? Relationships? Sex? Kids? Confidence? Dating? Career? Energy (hyper or low)? Health? Spirituality? Some or all of these?
I'd like to share something that would have helped me greatly had I learned it sooner. My hope is that it helps you right now with however you are feeling and whatever your struggles.
I've created a guiding, powerful framework called the Twelve Grief Rebel Healing Tenets. They are included in my free healing kickstarter and I use them in my coaching and as a personal guide everyday. One of the Tenets is 'Prioritizing My Self-Care is Necessary for Me to Heal'.
Are you prioritizing yourself? Are you coming first in your healing journey? It may seem counterintuitive to put yourself first. In fact, making yourself number one may feel downright wrong (at first).
I didn't prioritize myself or my healing early on. Like you, when my wife died I was exploded into a million pieces. She died giving birth to our son. So, not only did I experience the shock of her sudden death, but I was also thrust into the world of single parenting and the world of parenting a special needs child. (Our son, Leo, had many severe complications at birth.)
Needless to say, I didn't feel like I could prioritize myself. I felt trapped, abandoned, hurt and so very angry. I thought prioritizing myself was selfish, lazy and made me somehow weaker.
But looking back, knowing what I know now, what would it have looked like to prioritize myself and my healing? First, I would have asked for WAY more help (that's a Healing Tenet by the way). Then I would have taken A LOT more time for myself. Lastly, I would have known that not only was I being a GREAT Dad by prioritizing me, but Leo would have thrived, too!
I do prioritize myself and my healing, now. And guess what? The more I do the more my life AND my family's lives thrive!
What could it be like for you?
What could you transform in your life right now if you were to prioritize yourself and your healing?
I promise you that not only will you heal more quickly when your own healing is your top priority, but your world, like mine, will shift so that others around you (kids, family and other close relationships) will grow too.
(Yes, seems like the opposite would happen but, no, your healing does help others. BONUS!)
So, how do you prioritize you and your own healing?
Quite Simply. You. Get. Help.
(Pssst...that's a Healing Tenet, too!)
Whether it's me, a counselor, books, support groups or another coach, asking for and receiving help is NECESSARY to heal. If you've got help already and it's not working for you or not working as well as you want it to, then it's probably time to add or change the help you're choosing.
I'm not attached to who or what you choose. My hope is that you do choose to ask for and receive help. Whether it's me or you find another resource, my most heartfelt hope is that you get the help you need to choose yourself first, to heal bigger, and to not just survive but THRIVE.
I know ease, freedom and joy are possible for you RIGHT NOW.
I would love to hear how you're doing on your journey.
Your Partner in healing,
Jim
I'm ready to lean even more into my healing and prioritize myself at this very moment. I'd like to schedule my free, confidential, initial connection call with Jim. I'll at the very least discover something wonderful about myself, take a brave step in my healing journey and connect with another amazing human who's also experienced the death of his partner. By clicking here, I'm saying yes to me and my healing.
I'm ready to lean even more into my healing and prioritize myself at this very moment. I'd like to schedule my free, confidential, initial connection call with Jim. By clicking here, I'm saying yes to me and my healing.
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If you're still reading this and wanting to connect, talk, cry, yell (yes, yell!)
I urge you to schedule an initial Connection Call with me HERE.
If you're really hurting and don't want to reach out, I totally get that. I didn't really reach out for emotional and rebuild help for quite some time after my wife died. You will be ready at the perfect time for you. However you are doing your grief is PERFECT for you. There is NO WRONG WAY. However you are feeling and however intensely, although it may feel pretty awful...you WILL get through this. To learn more about how to heal more easily and practically, please, if you haven't yet, download my 12 Healing Widow Grief Rebel Tenets.
Your email is kept safe and confidential.
I will not share it.
If you're really hurting and don't want to reach out, I totally get that. I didn't really reach out for emotional and rebuild help for quite some time after my wife died. You will be ready at the perfect time for you. However you are doing your grief is PERFECT for you. There is NO WRONG WAY. However you are feeling and however intensely, although it may feel pretty awful...you WILL get through this. To learn more about how to heal more easily and practically, please, if you haven't yet, download my 'Life After Death' Healing Guide HERE.
If you're still reading this and wanting to connect, talk, cry, yell (yes, yell!) I urge you to schedule an initial Connection Call with me HERE.
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